Men as Allies: Clearing the Path, Not Just Holding the Mic
by Roman Ruzbacky Gender Equity Award Winner DEI Manager 2024
On the eve of International Women’s Day, I began to hear once again the familiar sounds of CEOs and politicians responding to the calls for action in tackling gender inequality in Australian workplaces, with the following familiar catch phrases, “There’s more to do…. We must do more …..We have a long way to go….Everyone needs to play a role here… We need to work together……We have to ensure that all women have….. It’s the right thing to do…” It appears to be a recurring theme. Well, that’s what I wrote in 2016.
At the time, I would have preferred to hear, “We are doing everything we can… We have thrown everything at it… We have left no stone unturned…..”
And now in 2025, apart from the cupcake debacle, there’s more serious business to deal with. Staying on course. And trusting the systems and processes we have cemented in place will keep us on course. The ship has set sail and there’s no turning back.
The backdrop of new forms of overt resistance, the usually covert forms of resistance, and throw in the myth of merit, noise and cognitive overload. It’s a familiar cycle. However, the key issue persists, the glaciers are possibly melting faster than the glacial pace of change to achieve gender equality.
And where are the men in all this? Who is going to show up this year? And who is going to do more? READ ON
Here are my top ten personal actions to be a better ally
Over the years I have become more intuitive in my diversity, equity and inclusion practice. Like driving a car, you become unconsciously competent and get better at looking at your blind spots, anticipating what other drivers do, avoiding obstacles and reading the traffic under all conditions.
Similarly with your own subject matter position and practice, you work on these consistently with discipline to become better at what you do. The tips below don’t operate in isolation, but if I were to unpack and isolate some of the key ingredients of my allyship, these are some of the things I contemplate and continue to work on.
- Having identity awareness – personally reflecting on how I come across, how I am perceived, being 6ft5, how I communicate and behave, as well as being my authentic self
- Acknowledging my limitations, hard-wired behaviours, and not having lived experience of gender inequity, and taking responsibility for mistakes and checking in on myself consistently
- Making time to listen attentively without judgment
- Having a curious mindset that seeks different experiences and perspectives, and not seeking comfort in sameness
- Immersing myself in opportunities to connect, listen, learn, build trust, respect and connection
- Being open to unlearning, more unlearning, then learning and not being afraid to ask questions, but understanding that some conversations are difficult and may bring past feelings of trauma
- Building my gender scholarship and data literacy
- Showing up with courage, determination, and adaptability to challenge the status quo. You can’t be afraid to get in the crossfire.
- Embracing the unique ways in which each person functions and contributes to our workplace and society
- Upstanding and not by-standing – supporting the rights of people who experience inequity, but intervening not interfering
It takes time and effort to disrupt and shift an existing system. For any disruption to be truly effective, everyone must play a part as everyone benefits.
“Coming together is a beginning, staying together is progress, and working together is success.” – Henry Ford